Internet shopping came along just in time for my Old Age, and since I moved on from canes (see this blog three years ago) I've spent hours online researching rollators.
Some vendors call them walkers -- but I think of those as the aluminum things the Old Ladies danced with in The Producers. I prefer the word rollator, which I'll bet was a made-up trademark that wasn't properly protected, so it lost the capital letter and some manufacturer lost the right to exclusive use.
My first one (see this blog three years ago) was a full-size affair that kept bumping into door frames and scratching furniture. So it's been limited to carrying in groceries.
Then I spent a few Internet hours searching for the lightest three-wheeler (no seat). Found one that weights eight pounds, no more than a newborn baby, and I can handle it folded up in the car.
And for around the house all day -- hang on, we'll get to the Fortune part -- I found a pediatric rollator just right for someone who is no longer five feet tall. At first the concept was pathetic, but then I realized that for a little kid who couldn't walk without it, this one would represent freedom, and I felt better about the whole thing. It's additionally useful for taking-it-from-here and carrying-it-there, which really constitutes the larger part of housekeeping.
So anyway, here's what could yield you, as Dr. Johnson wrote, riches beyond the fondest dreams of avarice. Okay -- all those rollator ads list exactly the same set of advantages:
But -- here's a closeup of my outfitted little companion:
*the grabber tucks nicely in the back, because anyone who needs a rollator can't really bend down to pick things up
*the flashlight is for times when one forgets to leave the lights on in the next room and is afraid of tripping
*the timer reminds one that those eggs will be hard-boiled in twenty minutes (see blog two years ago).
I'm not entirely joking. Some manufacturer could sweep the market with a deluxe fully-equipped rollator. All that's lacking is a niche for the smartphone.
You're welcome to the idea -- now somebody, please do something about this.