Saturday, November 2, 2013

Acronym in Progress

Today, back to the ostensible subject of this blog: being old.
I’m about to tape a checklist to the door that leads to the garage.  Otherwise, I get out to the car and find I’ve brought the wrong set of keys.  This entails a moderately painful get out of the car, unlock that door, fetch the right keys (forget to put the others back where they should go), moderately painful get back in the car.
Or I’m half-way down the driveway and realize I forgot the driving glasses.  (See remedial routine above.)  Or get all the way to the corner before I remember the cell phone (suppose I needed to call 911?).  Or arrive at the doctor’s office without the hearing aids.  Or get the only slot way back in a parking lot and discover I have no cane.  Or arrive at the checkout counter without my wallet.
Airline pilots and – these days – surgeons, use checklists to avoid mistakes, but come to think of it, perhaps I could manage with just an acronym.  I understand they’re routine in med school for things like memorizing the bones in the foot – and many of them are unprintable.  Easy to remember, impossible to forget.
 I can still see my mother standing at the kitchen sink, one day in 1934, telling me how to remember the names of the Great Lakes – HOMES.
And a couple of years before that, cousin Betty giving me my first piano lesson – those lines signify Every Good Boy Doth Finely.  Second thing you learned  – the first was the location of  Middle C -- right?

So what can I do with Keys, Wallet, Hearing aids, Glasses, Cane, Cell phone?
Distinct shortage of vowels there.  What if I make it Eyeglasses and Hearing Aids?
Wouldn’t you think an E would be simple to fit in?  And that extra C is still a problem.  Maybe I can just call it Phone.
Well, work in progress.  At least I don't have to worry about mislaying my purse.  I don't use 'em.


  1. absolutely laughing out loud!! will work on your acronym as well. and you know, taped to our door is a piece of paper that says on it:
    laptop? (this is ostensibly a list for nathan)
    so you aint the only one...

  2. The use of acronyms is ancient. In the Jewish passover prayer book an acronym to remember the 10 plagues is mentioned.
    I am using the memo pad on my mobile to remember the task at hand.
    I used to write paper notes' but always forgot where I put them

  3. and i want to also point out that if you had more than one set each of Keys, Wallet, Hearing aids, Glasses, Cane, and Cell phone, you could keep them ALL in a purse, and then only ever have to remember to grab your purse, where they would all live, all the time.

  4. hard to put a cane in a purse....