L'apres-midi d'une old lady

Efficiently set cell phone alarm for 12:30 so left in good time for 1 o’clock eye exam.  Had efficiently looked up location on Mapquest ahead of time just to make sure, yes, it’s off Westfall.  So I efficiently drove right past, on to Brighton-Henrietta Townline Road, couldn't find doctor's office, unpleasantly confused, finally doubled back just in time. 

As I walked in, realized it was the other ophthalmologist I meant to

return to; this one has an associated retail store across the hall and one can’t help wondering about conflict of interest.  But I was already there -- on time -- so wotthehell.
When the receptionist talked in a whisper, realized I wasn't wearing hearing aids. Checked in anyhow, sat down, remembered I hadn’t used tweezers, don’t want someone working that close to my face if possibile chin sprouts.  Cancelled appointment, left.
Drove to Staples, bought printer cartridge and copy paper, while backing out of parking space nearly ran into pedestrian.  Instead of giving me the finger he grinned and said “you left your trunk open, want me to shut it?” 
Stopped at Five Guys for cheeseburger (with onions), did not hear them yell order was ready, just kept sitting there.
Drove home, unloaded, discovered I'd left my purple cane somewhere along the way. Decided that if someone hired me for $35 to drive back and make inquiries in three different locations, I wouldn’t take the job.  So I’ll just buy a new purple cane.
    It’s only 3 pm.  Not sure it qualifies as a Guiness Record, but you’ve got to admit – definitely in the running for Most Blunders in a Single Two-Hour Period.