You must get these emails yourself -- pleas from your nephew who is suddenly in jail in Minnesota "please don't tell my folks, just send bail", and official congratulations about your sweepstakes award of $4,000,000 "held here in bond until you prepay the taxes".
Of course the column invites mail from strangers, and the address appears every week in dozens of newspapers, so I end up opening all sorts of exciting propositions. But here's a first, which arrived a couple of days ago:Attention. I am very sorry for you, is a pity that
this is how your life is going to end as soon as you don't comply...my duty as I am mailing you now is just to KILL you and I have...already been paid...Now do you want to LIVE OR DIE?...$8,000 is all you need to spend...
It's a long message, at least 800 words, and it ends --
...DO NOT THINK OF CONTACTING THE POLICE OR EVEN TELLING ANYONE...SOMEONE WHO KNOWS YOU VERY WELL WANTS YOU DEAD! I WILL EXTEND IT TO YOUR FAMILY IN CASE I NOTICE SOMETHING FUNNY...
On the off chance "someone who you called your friend" is reading this --